Woman Falls Off Cliff Mowing Lawn
I was rather salty on Saturday morning when the landscaping crew paid a visit to my block at 8:30 a.m. Have they no respect for my Friday night “man-about-town” adventures?
I thought I had a legit gripe to bring to work Monday morning. I could really bitch about my slumber being interrupted by the leaf blower that has enough horse power to propel a Boeing 747.
That was until I read about this lady:
A British pensioner has been rescued after falling 25m from her cliff-top garden while trying to mow the lawn.
First off, I’m pretty sure a pensioner is just the Brits’ way of seing retiree. So, this 66-year-old woman fell about 7 stories while mowing her lawn. How much would it suck to show up at work and try to explain that one.
Lame coworker: Aw man, Von Kaiser — What the hell happened to you?
Von Kaiser: Yeah…so…remember that sick view I showed you guys at the BBQ last summer?
Lame coworker: Yeah! Man, I’m so jealous of that. What happened?
Von Kaiser: Well, I was mowing the lawn and I FELL OFF THE CLIFF.
Lucky for this woman, two teenagers found her lying on the jagged rocks after she fell. She’s apparently in stable condition.
So everyone can live happily ever after if I can just find the landscaping guys on my block to squeeze this woman’s block in Scotland into their Saturday morning schedule.