Most of us toss and turn when we hear “yearly review.” It’s a similar feeling from elementary school when you await the report from the parent-teacher conference. You already know about your own performance and behavior, but worry there is a hidden camera that caught you stealing a No. 2 pencil, and will force you to repeat the 4th grade as punishment.

Unless your company is sky rocketing in success, the yearly review can generally be summed up as, “Blah, Blah, Blah. No raise, sucker. Maybe next year.”

I was not only lucky enough to start at a company in the midst of a recession, but also so very fortunate to be the last employee hired by the infamous office manager con artist.

After offering me the receptionist job, the office manager reiterated that my requested salary would be matched in just a few months. I took the job knowing that I would be a tighter on a budget, but it felt promising to know this would change soon.

Cut to months later, and the office manager is MIA. Apparently she quit after a series of unreturned phone calls by sending an anonymous FedEx package. Turns out, the damages left by the scheming office manager were so bad, forensic accountants had to come in to figure out if she stole the missing money or if she was just negligent. It was an unsolved episode of CSI: OFFICE.

The only perks of being at the front desk is that to get to hear and see pieces of the drama unfold. I became the Nancy Drew of reception, monitoring the types of calls and tracking the people coming in the office, just for my own mental note. I surmised 401Ks no longer existed and raises were just a past time delight. I left my colleagues in the dark as to not stir up the office.

With the knowledge I had deducted, I walked into my “yearly review” for 2009 with no nerves. Receiving a raise was out of the question, and there are little-to-no improvements that can be made to a job that can basically be done during an REM cycle.

As I anticipated, there wasn’t much to say, and I was informed that I received a significantly larger salary than some assistants in the company (that’s just sad). Before wrapping up, I was asked if there was anything else I wanted to say. Of course there was a million things I wanted to say, but I was able to boil it down to one thought:

“I’m just in a frustrating position because there have been a few opportunities to move up, and I have turned them down to stay focused on acting outside of work.”

The partners nodded, aware of my goal. You could tell they felt a little empathy.

One asked, “Are there any other types of responsibilities here that would help you so you aren’t just answering phones?”

Without hesitation I said, “Well, I just started watering the plants.”

Perhaps I had the potential of convincing them to give me a raise with a few added responsibilities; but looking back, that was a pretty epic moment to see the confusion on their faces.

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