Notable Black Friday Stories


The Monday after a holiday weekend is the worst. You went from eating your face off, to relaxing, to eating your face off more, to shopping and it all came full circle when the alarm went off this morning.

We get it. Major case of the Mondays.

Because we’re in this together, we’ve gathered some Black Friday must-reads, because you know these clowns are having a bigger case of the Mondays than you are. Don’t be surprised if any of these all-stars are your coworkers.

Woman Uses Pepper Spray At Walmart
This is probably the most notable story from this installment of Black Friday.

The woman, whose name was not released, is suspected of firing pepper spray into a crowd in order to clear a path to a crate of Xbox video game players that were being unwrapped late Thanksgiving night at a Walmart in the upscale Porter Ranch section of the San Fernando Valley.

Is it me or is pepper spray making a huge comeback, especially in California?

And are we sure it wasn’t this guy?

pepper spray black friday

Gotta get my copy of Modern Warfare 3!

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Police Get Overzealous With Arizona Grandpa

According to some reports, an elderly man tucked two video games into his waistband to free his hands so he could help his grandson who was being manhandled by a rabid Walmart crowd.

Police witnessed and questioned the man. Then, he somehow tripped, landed on his face, knocked out cold and bleeding. The police then handcuffed him. Here’s a video, with a fair amount of language:

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Occupy Wall Street Chimes In

Occupy Wall Street is a topic we haven’t gotten into on this site, mostly because they don’t work in offices. But they were out and about on Black Friday, harassing people to buy local.

Sure, that’s exactly what they need to get people on their side: Chastising them for trying to save some money around the holidays. This is why everyone asks “What do they want?”

Let me know when my local stores make a 50″ LED for $17 and I’ll buy there.

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Multiple Shootings

There were reports of shootings in Fayetteville, NC and another at the Walmart in San Leandro in California (I think we’re seeing a pattern here).

Both appear to be robbery attempts, and not a rabies-infected soccer mom trying to get a digital camera for the same price as a pack of gum.

Bottom line: If you went out after your big Thanksgiving meal, we hope you safely scored some deals. If you went out to laugh at everyone, as I do each year with my brother, more power to you. If you pepper sprayed someone, you’re why I’m in a bad mood today.

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One Response to “Notable Black Friday Stories”
  1. McFly says:

    I’m skeptical about the Grandpa one

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